The Day Flicker the Fleezle Snoofed

            Flicker the fleezle was a well liked guy. Just like all the other fleezles, he had a fat little body that narrowed into a fluffy top. His feet were larger than normal and his eyes were bright with excitement, no matter what he was doing. Every other fleezle was jealous of his bright blue color.

He loved to play plorkle, it was his favorite game. One day when he was playing, an odd thing happened. He got all tingly inside and then he changed color!  Suddenly he was lime green! All the other fleezles stopped what they were doing, and gaped at him with a loud, “ohhhh”.

Flicker waddled as fast as he could, crying and snoofing all the way home! Pink, yellow, and purple, his colors did change. It was not very normal, but ever so strange!He didn’t like what was happening. He thought he was sick. His mouth tasted funny, so spat and cried “Ick!”.

When he finally got home, his mamma was there. He asked her, “Why do I keep snoofing? It isn’t fair!”.She smiled and held him. She knew what had happened to him. She explained that snoofing meant he was growing up. Once he turned white, it meant that he was grown up.

This really scared Flicker. He didn’t want to grow up. None of his other friends were snoofing. He couldn’t sleep because he kept shaking. He couldn’t be with his friends because they kept laughing. He couldn’t even concentrate on schoolwork because he kept tingling so much. Every day he would cry and cry. Everyday his mom would hold him and tell him it was going to be alright. Only that didn’t make it any easier for Flicker.

About a week after he started snoofing, he turned a pale yellow. Then, his head started to hurt. He got dizzy and fell on the ground. His mom was in the other room when she heard the loud thump. She ran over to him, with a wide grin on her face.

“Why are you smiling?!” cried Flicker. He was not enjoying himself, and he couldn’t see why his mom was.

“It is time, Flicky,” she whispherd, “Time to change to white.”

“Well how do I do that?” Flicker asked.

“By letting go. Just let yourself grow up” she stated as she smoothed his fluff.

Flicker replied, “I… I can’t mom. I’m scared”.

“I know, sweetie. But you can do it,” she urged.

Flicker gulped really hard and held his breath. Then he let go, and let himself calm down. Slowly, his fluff turned bright white. “Wow” he gapsed. Suddenly, he wasn’t hurting anymore. Then he realized that he could do all sorts of things that he could never do before. He could turn his fluff whatever color he wanted. He could jump even higher and run even faster.

Flicker decided to go outside and show his new skills to his friends. Right when he did, his best friend, Flookernaughter, snoofed for the first time. “Oh no!” he cried.

“Don’t worry,” said Flicker, “growing up isn’t so bad after you do it!” With that, he snoofed back to his bright blue color. “But some things, are worth keeping”.

The Terror of Being Known

I'm afraid to pour all of myself out to you.

What if it doesn't fill you up?

If I give you all, and you reject it, there is nothing for me to fall back upon.

No secrets.

No facades.

No safety nets.

Just me. 

Instead, I find it easier to give a bit of myself to everyone. 

My thoughts to one.

My emotions to another.

My charm to some.

My weakness to a trusted few.

If I only give you a part of me, then I will never know rejection.

You'll only hate my opinion.

Or my action.

Or my thought.

Or my notion.

Never my being.

Never myself.

Never all of me.

Never complete vulnerability.

My own ignorant delusion.

No pain or regret.

Just the idea that, somehow, I am worth something to somebody.

They just don't know it.

Best Friends

A best friend isn't the person you spend all your time with. You may do a lot together; you may hardly see them. A best friend doesn't know all your secrets and embarrassments. You might not tell them anything. A best friend won't always be by your side. They might be gone tomorrow.

A best friend is somebody that, no matter the circumstances, is in your life. Whether you love them, hate them, confide in them, condemn them, cherish them, or can't stand them, they are yours. And somehow or another, you are theirs.

A best friend may be in your life forever, or just just for a chapter. A best friend, for better or for worse, is in your life for a reason. A best friend will be remembered. A best friend made a difference. 

A Caution to Others

Caution: Avoid cliches and facades.

Do not confess to recently broken or wounded hearts and do not expect anything in return for professing.

Do not set free in presence of doubt or insecurities. 

Contents under pressure.

Do not place heart in darkened room or near others without defects, baggage, or regrets.

Do not puncture or incinerate self value.

Do not use on people who think that they understand love.

Discover together.

The Letter

Dear Son,

I love you.

I know you don't really understand right now.
I know my ways can seem difficult and unnecessary.
But I have a plan.

I desire good for you.
Not destruction.

I want to give you a future.
I want to give you hope.

I know you are wondering why it hurts.

Just remember, I love you.

I never intended this for you.
I created you to be in relationship with me.
Perfect relationship with me.

I would breathe you life.
Your breath would bring me praise.

I wanted only for you to have peace.
I was going to forever care for you:

No Ailment
No Sickness.
No pain.

I only intended good for you.
I want to show you hope.

Please remember, I love you even when you doubt my existence.

You put yourself above me.
Which placed you far below me.
There was nothing you could do on your own.

Put down these fig leaves.
Allow me to clothe you fully.

I know you feel hurt.
Abandoned.
Destroyed.

I want to bring you health.
Security.
Restoration. 

I'm working through your safety nets.
I'm tearing down your walls.

You have to surrender.
But not for yourself.

You have to surrender.
But only for Me. 

You don't have to play the victim.

You have always been loved.

I'll love you forever,
Your Father in Heaven.

Fill Me Up

I'm tearing off my fig leaves, I'm
Ready to be clothed by You.
I'm taking off this mask So I
Can see beyond this lens of hopelessness. 


For You loved me before I loved myself, You
Saved me before this self-salvation.
And now I'm dying from starvation.


You fill me up, You make me whole.
You clean my spirit and my soul.


Nothing else could I ever ask for.
You fill me up like never before.


I will surrender selflessly.
It is for you and not for me.
Your pow'r overtakes my facade.
And turns my blackened hear to white because



You loved me before I loved myself, You
Saved me before this self-salvation.
And now I'm dying from starvation.


You fill me up, You make me whole.
You clean my spirit and my soul.


Nothing else could I ever ask for.
You fill me up like never before.


Your intention's not for suffering.
You intended us for life. 
Strip me of my all consuming pride.
So I can see the light in you, God.



You loved me before I loved myself, You
Saved me before this self-salvation.
And now I'm dying from starvation.


You fill me up, You make me whole.
You clean my spirit and my soul.


Nothing else could I ever ask for.
You fill me up like never before.


You fill me up like never before.

Conviction is Lost

The memories are beginning to fade which makes her feel uneasy.
She is torn between continuing to cling to her shattered remains or admit it is time for rebirth.
The past was challenging and difficult.

Safe.

The unknown brings new dangers and uncharted territory that does more than terrify her.
It makes her question her essence.

The broken glass lies bloody on the floor.
The scars of her mind and body ache with nostalgia.
She is finally forced to confront the delicate struggles tangling her thoughts and flooding her ability to comprehend.

To break it would unleash a new furry.
The restore it would protect the evil that consumes.

The waves draw in and out on the shoreline.
Each crash coincides with her sharp breath.
Her lungs feel torn down and worn out.
Yet a new strength seems to be lingering
Awaiting its chance.

As the point grows nearer, the air grows thinner.
As the air grows thinner, the thoughts grow weaker.
As the thoughts grow weaker, the actions grow timid.
As the actions grow timid, conviction is lost.

nondescript

the milk has spoiled.
the ham is bad.
the bread is moldy.
the soda's flat.

the charge is deadened.
the screen is cracked.
the circuit's shorting.
the cord has snapped.

the button fell off.
the liner's ripped.
the fabric's fading.
the stitch is stripped.

the button's sticky.
the service died.
the flip ain't flipping.
the screen won't slide.

the lens is chipped off.
the bottom rusted.
the strap is strained brown.
the side's encrusted.

the letter's jumbled.
the crispness left.
the angle's crooked.
the color's bereft.

the point has dulled down.
the grip has slipped.
the use is gone now.
you're nondescript.

I'd Make Shakespeare Weep

I could write you a poem
Because I think I understand love.
I could sing you a song
To tell of things I’m not proud of.

I’d make Shakespeare weep
If I could capture your essence on paper.
I’d make Mozart cry out.
No music could ever be greater.

But I can’t really write well.
Hell, I can hardly read.
I don’t have the rhythm
I can’t seem to succeed.

I could give you a dozen flowers.
My heart scooped out of my chest.
I could tell of when I fell
In a note with all expressed.

But I haven’t got the money.
And I haven’t got the guts.
You would simply laugh at me.
It isn’t worth the fuss.

But then you walk right past me.
My breath is gone once more.
I don’t know that I’ll catch it.
I don’t want the cure.

You deserve a real man.
Not a boy like me.
You deserve your ever after.
I know that you’d agree.

But don’t I deserve love as well?
Aren’t I human too?
I’ll just wait for tomorrow.
Maybe then I’ll break through.

Ode to Pineapple

My sweet fruit,
You once were so kind.
Your very essence was
Heaven  aligned.


Your taste tickled my buds
And pleased my lips.
Your texture treated my tongue
Until your juice wouldn't drip.


Now you look with vengeance.
I hate your being.
Your gustation turned sour.
From you, I am fleeing.


Away from my family,
You tore me with malice.
I wish that I could believe
You maybe won't fail us.


But I know the truth,
I know your evil.
You poisoned my body,
And caused an upheaval.


I'll stay away from you,
If you let me be
I'd rather be healthy,
Than totally free.




I miss you, sweet fruit.

The Phone Call

Hey Babe,
I'm running late, I won't be home till seven.
I'll get dinner on my way.


Is everything ok?
You sound like you were crying?
What happened? Who did this?


I'm coming home right now.

The Fading Essence

His voice no longer captures people's thoughts.
They've forgotten the truth he once held.
His actions cease to captivate their minds.

The past has tainted the masses.

The significance of his essence is fading.
The sardonic pleasure falling from his lips will forever remind us that nobody is invincible.
Nobody can survive.


Her smile no longer sparks true happiness.
They've learnt that it was forced.
Her laughter is full of emptiness
That can no longer full people to hope.
The significance of her essence is fading.
The detachment from her body will forever haunt those that necessitated her foundation most desperately.
Nobody can survive.


His hands have lost the magic that once inspired.
They've figured out his tricks.
Eloquence no longer holds any influence.
Words are merely words. No more, maybe less.
The significance of his essence is fading
Ignorance was bliss for the few without it and the power to maintain the illusions.
Not even they can survive.


Wonder and mystique long forgotten how to impose appeal.
They've decided they'd rather grow up.
Equations and arbitrary limitations must be put forth.
Nothing can exist without rules.
The significance of their essence is fading.
The progression of arrogance has led to the fountain of youth that dried decades ago.
Who would want to survive?

Superficiality

Superficiality is catching like the flu.
There's no vaccine, no cure, no hope.
You're goin' to catch it too.


Superficiality is sweeping like a flood.
The past is dead. The present's hell.
The future's full of blood.


Superficiality is consuming all the truth.
The credit's gone. The meaning's bleak.
No innocence in youth.


Superficiality is corrupting from the core.
It starts too slow, no way to know;
No symptoms to look for.


Superficiality will one day surely die.
But only if people admit
They much prefer the lie.

What Life Means to Me

This is a free-write that I recently discovered in the process of composing my journals for my English class. Add some breaks and batta-bom. Poetry- or at least something interesting to read.

Life means different things to me at different times.

When I am happy, slept well, distressed: I typically look at life as an adventure to explore. 

Never ending twists and turns. 

Bam. Make it happen.

When I am looking at the stars or the sunset, I see the world as a puzzle.

The mystery and wonder is mine to contemplate.

Logic, luck, glamour.

I feel small. Insignificant even. 

I ponder my meaning.

Life feels like a game to won.

Sometimes life pisses me off.

There are times I don't see the point.

We come. 

We live.

We die. 

We come into life unable to physically do anything.

Then we are bound by society to conform to their morals. 

After we are "old enough" to make decisions for ourselves, finances trap us.

We work.

We sweat and cry until we are too old to physically do anything.

Then our minds leave us. 

Then we're gone.

Alone.

Dark,

Free?

I consider myself a hopeful person.

I believe Jesus is coming back for me.

Life should be a party.

Yet, we let Greed, Anger, and Insecurites get in our way. 

Life is about letting go.

Life is acceptance.

Life is meant to be good.

It is up to us.

Perspective is everything.

Without it, life can be nothing.

i merely am

my world isn't fading.
death is nowhere to be found.
there is nothing on the line.
i merely long for the long forgotten sense of recognition.


my memory is irreparably damaged of knowledge of acceptance and meaning.
i'm not depressed. 
i'm not enthused.
i'm not aware.
i merely am.


i don't melt at Your words.
Your presence settles me into a comfortable state of familiarity. 
there is no fear.
there is no reward.


to continue to force a belief that there is more is pathetic.  
i deserve at least that.
there is assurance in solidity of knowledge.


i don't long for my predisposed and ignorant understanding of love.
attraction is formed through a chemical reaction in our brains at the sight of another being that arouses us.


how romantic.


Your conversations don't capture me in a suspension of exploding desire like they used to.
the sight of You no longer stirs a response from the man within me.
any eloquently written scripts of love and passion devolved to superficiality and a weak attempt of persuasion. 


i only wanted to be wanted.
You're arms are cold.
hold me tighter.  

Excuses

That moment of silence when there are no words left to say.
I tried.
I did my best. 
I'm not enough.


There isn't anything I can say now. Is there?
No magic words. No healing phrases. No thoughts of comfort.
I let you down.


It wasn't the first time. God knows it better be the last.
I wish I could blame you.
I wish I could blame them.
I wish I could blame anything in the world. 




I just want you to look at me again.




I'm a human, right? 
Humans make mistakes.
Mistakes help us grow.
Growing lets us learn.


I haven't learned. Have I?


"I'll do better next time?"
"It'll never happen again."
"I finally got it out of my system."
"From now on, I'm clean!"


You've heard all my lies. 
You know all my tricks.
I'm pathetic. 
You deserve more.


My breath is stale from excuses.
Your ears are bloody from pretending to believe. 


The movie is over.
You can finally go home. 

Stops My Heart

The smoke that leaves your lips
Stops my heart.
It eats my mind.
It consumes my thoughts.


The venom you spew
Stops my heart.
It spreads through my body.
It prickles my skin.



The lies you sling
Stop my heart.
They block my air.
They clog my veins.


The way you look at me
Stops my heart.
It chokes my words.
It forces my eyes open.


The love you steal from me
Stops my heart.
It stops my heart.
You stop my heart. 

The Blurry Page

Staring at the blurry page, 
I don't know what to write.
I feel no motivation now, 
But I'll write just in spite.


I'll tell a tale of dragons
Knights, and Quests, and Blood.
Or a tale of Romance:
A woman and her stud.


Do you want to hear of mystery?
A man in a tall cloak?
The Cowboys and the Indians
Disappeared in a puff of smoke. 


A princess who needs saving
Helps a boy become a man.
A villain is defeated, 
They stopped his evil plan.


Listening to silence, 
I don't know what to write.
I'm feeling rather sleepy now.
For now I'll just sit tight. 

Hate and Love are Fire and Ice.

Love can not be defined in passing.

Some think it is rather quaint.

They don't understand the bigger picture:

That your heart- It will easily taint.

Hate has a larger significance

Than what we try and give it.

There is a deeper, darker part

One can't always acquit.

Hate and love are fire and Ice. 

As different as different can be.

One is happy, the other sad:

Wouldn't you agree?

But that is not the case.

They're closer than you think.

Go too far one way, there you are! 

They actually interlink.

Love and Hate take so much effort

To truly do them well.

You deserve so little from me.

Apathy is all I'll dispel.

Beauty

Beauty is formed through the loss of perfection.
So why do you cover your face?
That pimple, that blemish, that scratch and the scar
Are charm no blush can replace.


Forget about the magazines,
They use computers and lies.
I much prefer the light of the moon
And the reflection in your eyes.


Your beauty is found in your smile.
Your grace is in your heart.
There's so much more in this world
Plus it doesn't hurt you're smart.


Embrace your idiosyncrasies.
Embrace your "faults" and "flaws."
God made you with a special plan.
Good things: you'll be the cause. 


Beauty is found in the loss of perfection,
But maybe not in your case.
For you were perfect in my eyes
Before you covered your face.

William Carlos Williams

These three were written for my CHS English Class. It is my first attempt at found poems, or free verse for that matter... Enjoy! Or don't, I don't control you.

The Flame

the flame quivers

gently

as the cat

watches

the spark slowly

die

and the room grow

dark

A Handy Guide

a handy guide to forget your

past purchases

of minor aches and other

frozen pains

do not read if you’ve never had a

heartache-related reaction to love

may cause bloating

Frozen Pizza

1) Pre-heat relationship to first date.

2) Remove heart from chest and place on your sleeve.

3) Place trust in her for 20-30 years or until finished life. 

Blue Skies lost their Wonder

I'm finished with this suffering.
I'm done with all this pain.
I'm sick of all this rambling.
I will not be the same.


I wouldn't say I'm happy now.
I wouldn't say I'm not.
I don't feel really anything.
It's really not a lot.


Apathy running boldly,
Coursing through my veins.
Confusion bubbling upward,
Not sure of what pertains.


Blue skies lost their wonder.
Dark clouds lost their scare.
Forgetting how to smile,
Yet I don't even care.


Failing doesn't matter.
Success is not a choice.
I can't even think right now.
How can I have a voice?


The lights are all burnt out now.
I'm sitting here alone.
Yet there are people everywhere.
I'm better on my own.

Drip.

This poem is dedicated to an individual that would freak out if I put their name on the internet. You know who you are. With love, your poem.

Drip. Feel the sweat.
Drop. See the blood.
Tick. Claw your way.
Tock. To the top.
Drip. Make mistakes.
Drop. Pay the price.
Tick. Fall back down.
Tock. To your start.
Drip. Understand.
Drop. Life goes.
Tick. Then accept.
Tock. You are more.

Through the Eyes of Princess Jasmine

Running forward,
Bouncing Back.
Reaching Toward you,
Touching Glass.
Peering outward,
My view a blur.
My hands are numbing.
I need more.
Just to see you,
never touch.
It is my torture.
It's not enough.
The sand is dripping.
My ankle's trapped.
I had my moment.
My chance elapsed.
Now I wait here,
Slowly covered
By the sand
Of my lost Lover.

I pray to God

If I pass you on the street, 
I pray to God: our eyes to meet.


If I meet you in my sleep, 
I dream to God: my heart, you'll keep.


If I love you in real life, 
I hope to God, you'll be my wife.


And If I wed you in the rain, 
I trust to God you'll share my pain. 

Perspectives

I can see us now,
Rocking in our chairs, 
Sipping lemonade, 
Our grand-kids upstairs.


I can see us now,
Hair turning grey, 
Wrinkles setting in, 
Our love turned ballet.


I can see us now,
Finding something new, 
Finding something borrowed, 
Both old and new. 


I can see us now,
Me waiting there, 
You walking down, 
Fresh flowers in your hair.


I can see us now, 
Discovering hope, 
Experiencing pain, 
We'll learn how to cope.


I can see us now,
Our awkward first date, 
My lame pick up lines, 
It's not a mistake. 


Why can't you see
What's right in front of us, 
The joy that we could have?
You are the one I trust.


For now I'll wait, 
Laugh, cry, and mourn.
You'll never care.
You'd think I would learn.
I'll stand up, move on.
I do not know how.
I'll probably fail. 
I can see it now. 

Will you weep?

Love is simple,
Love is kind.
Can't tame these feelings
In my mind

Calm, Collected.
Sure, I'm fine.
Depression creeping.
I'm on the line.

Clawing, scraping,
Gasping for life.
Falling, fading:
My internal strife.

Should I reach out?
Can I break free?
The silver I saw,
I no longer see.

Holding my chest,
longing for breath,
this terrifying tango,
this dance of death.

Then you came,
nose stuck in a book.
My heart, my mind:
you cluelessly took.

My heart was in shock.
My mind insane.
Sitting rock bottom,
the whole world to gain.

Yet there you sat,
not knowing, entranced.
Our meeting, your smile.
It wasn't by chance. 

Now day after day
I wonder, I ponder.
Alone with my pen,
my hope: please don't squander.

Just give me a glance.
Give me a shot!
All I want is a moment.
It isn't a lot.

You don't know me.
Mayhap you never will.
It all depends 
what I do with this pill.