Tuesday, December 4, 2012

The Day Flicker the Fleezle Snoofed

            Flicker the fleezle was a well liked guy. Just like all the other fleezles, he had a fat little body that narrowed into a fluffy top. His feet were larger than normal and his eyes were bright with excitement, no matter what he was doing. Every other fleezle was jealous of his bright blue color.
He loved to play plorkle, it was his favorite game. One day when he was playing, an odd thing happened. He got all tingly inside and then he changed color!  Suddenly he was lime green! All the other fleezles stopped what they were doing, and gaped at him with a loud, “ohhhh”.
Flicker waddled as fast as he could, crying and snoofing all the way home! Pink, yellow, and purple, his colors did change. It was not very normal, but ever so strange!He didn’t like what was happening. He thought he was sick. His mouth tasted funny, so spat and cried “Ick!”.
When he finally got home, his mamma was there. He asked her, “Why do I keep snoofing? It isn’t fair!”.She smiled and held him. She knew what had happened to him. She explained that snoofing meant he was growing up. Once he turned white, it meant that he was grown up.
This really scared Flicker. He didn’t want to grow up. None of his other friends were snoofing. He couldn’t sleep because he kept shaking. He couldn’t be with his friends because they kept laughing. He couldn’t even concentrate on schoolwork because he kept tingling so much. Every day he would cry and cry. Everyday his mom would hold him and tell him it was going to be alright. Only that didn’t make it any easier for Flicker.
About a week after he started snoofing, he turned a pale yellow. Then, his head started to hurt. He got dizzy and fell on the ground. His mom was in the other room when she heard the loud thump. She ran over to him, with a wide grin on her face.
“Why are you smiling?!” cried Flicker. He was not enjoying himself, and he couldn’t see why his mom was.
“It is time, Flicky,” she whispherd, “Time to change to white.”
“Well how do I do that?” Flicker asked.
“By letting go. Just let yourself grow up” she stated as she smoothed his fluff.
Flicker replied, “I… I can’t mom. I’m scared”.
“I know, sweetie. But you can do it,” she urged.
Flicker gulped really hard and held his breath. Then he let go, and let himself calm down. Slowly, his fluff turned bright white. “Wow” he gapsed. Suddenly, he wasn’t hurting anymore. Then he realized that he could do all sorts of things that he could never do before. He could turn his fluff whatever color he wanted. He could jump even higher and run even faster.
Flicker decided to go outside and show his new skills to his friends. Right when he did, his best friend, Flookernaughter, snoofed for the first time. “Oh no!” he cried.
“Don’t worry,” said Flicker, “growing up isn’t so bad after you do it!” With that, he snoofed back to his bright blue color. “But some things, are worth keeping”.

The Terror of Being Known

I'm afraid to pour all of myself out to you.
What if it doesn't fill you up?

If I give you all, and you reject it, there is nothing for me to fall back upon.

No secrets.
No facades.
No safety nets.

Just me. 

Instead, I find it easier to give a bit of myself to everyone. 
My thoughts to one.
My emotions to another.
My charm to some.
My weakness to a trusted few.

If I only give you a part of me, then I will never know rejection.
You'll only hate my opinion.
Or my action.
Or my thought.
Or my notion.

Never my being.
Never myself.

Never all of me.
Never complete vulnerability.


My own ignorant delusion.
No pain or regret.

Just the idea that, somehow, I am worth something to somebody.

They just don't know it.